Thought I would update.....

I don't know if I will keep up with this blog right now since I started it to keep friends and family updated about our life with Moira. This was the e-mail I sent out a few weeks ago updating friends and family who didn't know what happened to our beloved little girl, Moira Mae. Like I said, don't know if I will keep it updated. Maybe I will when we get pregnant again, because we will. We will have a baby who we can bring home from the hospital, love and hug and watch grow up. Moira will always be in our hearts and we will never forget her.


I was hoping to be able to write to you all and give you a wonderful update of our little girl's arrival. Sadly, I have to tell you that Moira passed away on Monday. There were some complications during labor with her heartbeat. My doctor ended up performing an emergency c-section on me Friday morning after laboring all day Thursday and Friday morning. When Moira was born, she wasn't breathing and it took them 10 minutes to start her breathing. In that time she suffered severe brain damage. There has been some talk that something could have been happening before birth with the placenta, but it was somewhere between Wednesday and Friday. I had gone in Wed. for an ultrasound and at that time everything looked good. The NICU doctor wanted to try a fairly new cooling therapy that helps prevent anymore brain damage and it takes 72 hours to do it. We tried that, but by Monday morning it was looking like there would be no change in Moira's condition because it was so severe. We spent the weekend with close friends and family who were so happy to have had the chance to meet Moira. On Monday Dave and I spent the whole day with her and also started the process of warming her to take her off of the ventilator. By 5:30 she was warm again and we took the ventilator off. From 5:30-11pm that night we held Moira in our arms and spent the evening with her. She passed away at 11pm that night, peacefully in our arms. We had four precious and wonderful days with our daughter and I wish I could have more, but I was able to hold her in my arms to comfort her when she was in pain. That meant the world to Dave and I. The fact that she is at peace and not in pain anymore makes it a little easier for us. This is probably one of the hardest e-mails I have ever had to write. We do have tons of pictures of our beautiful little girl and I am happy to share them if you would like me to. It just might take me some time to be ready to share them with you all.

Thank you all for listening.

Alison and Dave

Moira Mae

8lbs 3oz, 21.5 inches of beautiful baby born May 8, 2009-May 11, 2009

Induction day tomorrow, but I am feeling like labor is starting some on it's own!! Lost my mucous plug this morning, having some spotting, and some cramping and contractions. I would love it if labor started on its own!! We'll see, next time I post, I'll be a mommy!!

By this time next week Moira should already be here and I will be celebrating my first Mother's Day with my new daughter and my mom here too!! I can't believe that in 4 days I will be heading into the hospital and hopefully by Friday Moira will be here. Ahhh!!! Unless she decides to come on her own, which I would love much better. I would much rather avoid the induction, but that's OK. As long as she gets here safely and healthy!
YAY!!!

Posted on my Facebook today!

Moira's impending arrival


As I get closer and closer to the arrival of our beautiful daughter, I have to think back on how we got here. Dave and I will be married for 9 years on August 12th of this year. We have been through ups and downs like any other marriage. I went to school full-time for the first 3 years we were married and only worked part-time which was tough on the budget. Then I worked doing home services for children with autism and although I loved my job, the commute and all of the time I spent in the car made for stressful times at home. We went through a rough patch about 5 years ago, but we got through it and grew much closer. We focused on our marriage and paying off some bills so that we could finally buy our own house. We decided that when we bought a house, we would start trying to get pregnant. Finally in April of 2007 we bought our first house after 7 years of marriage and all of our ups and downs, mostly ups!! We started trying to conceive almost right away. Month after month there was heartache, no baby. Finally in March of 2008 we went to a fertility doctor and in April 2008 we started with appointments and procedures for me to determine what the problem was. I wasn't ovulating, so that meant medications and IUI's, Inter Uterine Insemination. I have been very open with everyone about the whole process with anyone who wants to listen, so I really don't mind talking about it. We did three months in a row, June, July, and August, of medications and the IUI's. Every month, on the 13th of the month, I had my IUI. On August 13th was the last one and then Labor Day weekend we found out it took!! Our lucky little peanut conceived on the 13th of the month was finally a reality!! After 15 months of trying to conceive and all of the fertility appointments, we were FINALLY going to be parents. So, as the date of Moira's arrival gets closer, we both grow more and more anxious for her to get here. We have had 9 years to be together, enjoy ourselves, do what we want, relax, read, and be alone. We are now more than ready to give that all up! I can't wait to be mom and for Dave to be a dad. I would much rather be up in the middle of the night for a feeding than to be up because I have to pee or I have a headache or my leg hurts from the sciatica. Who knows how I will feel after a few months of that, but as of right now, I have had enough rest, I want this baby!!!:)
Anyway, if you made it this far through this note, thanks for listening. Now you see why I am so anxious and why I don't want to be on maternity leave without a baby! We'll see what my doctor says on Wednesday of this week!

38 weeks 5 days

cranky

* I am tired! I spent last night in L & D because my right foot/ankle was totally swollen, but my left wasn't. They wanted me to come in and everything is fine now. I was there from 9:30pm-1:40am

* Both of my feet, ankles, and legs, are swollen today.

* I am cranky and crabby for no reason.

* I have a headache too.

* It's hot here and I am 10 times hotter than it really is, so I am glad I won't be pregnant all summer long.

* I want this baby to come today!!!:)

* Dave thinks that I am going to go into labor soon because my mood has changed the last few days. I was contracting last night while in L & D, but didn't feel anything.

* Tuesday I am going to check out a store about 45 minutes from our house that has cloth diapers and supplies, wooden toys, slings, etc. I am so excited!! I want to see if they have a wet bag and/or diaper pail liner too.

* Sorry for complaining. I am in that kind of mood. I can't even wear my flip flops.

* I am glad I don't have to work tomorrow. Yay!!

* I got the car seat installed today at the police station, it makes me feel so much better that it's in their safely and correctly!

*OK, I am tired and I am going to bed soon, even though it's 8pm.

*Thanks for listening!

Moira can come anytime now!!

We got back from Babies R Us a little while ago and some other errands too. We got a little over $200 from Dave's school, the English and History departments, a $25 gift card from one of the women at my school, plus a ton of clothes and stuff from the little baby shower the special ed. department threw for me, and we had some money of our own. I spent about $300 and got a bunch of stuff from our registry plus some other things, so now I feel better. Moira can come for sure now!! We needed a few more sheets for the pack and play and covers for the changing table. I also wanted to have a couple of bottles on hand along with some breast milk storage bags just to get started with. We won't use them until later in the summer, but I wanted a few. I got two of the Born Free glass bottles and these covers to go over them so if they are dropped they hopefully won't break. I don't have a breast pump yet, but I am going to look for one on Craigslist over the summer. I also got some more onesies, a few more cute rompers for her to wear during the summer, a few more sleepers because I felt like I didn't have enough, more hangers for the closet, more towels and washcloths, and a bunch of other things. Still don't have a diaper bag, but I asked my mom if she would get me one. She said she would!!:)
I came home and ordered some Burt's Bees baby stuff from drugstore.com, I love that site, some 7th Generation wipes to go along with my cloth wipes, and some more 7th Generation baby laundry detergent. The 7th generation stuff was on sale. I always get free shipping from drugstore.com and I usually have drugstore.com dollars too. So, free shipping and I saved some money too! We also bought a little fan for her room to circulate the air when she is in there. We had taken down the crappy ceiling fan and replaced it with a nice light fixture. We decided not to put another fan in the room because we didn't like any of them. Instead a small fan for the room should be good. It's a small room anyways!!:)
Still need a wetbag and diaper pail bag. I haven't found any I like on the cloth diaper sites, or the ones I like only come in smalls because they are out of the sizes. I want to make sure I have a good sized wetbag for daycare in the fall and when we travel this summer.
OK, I have to go put all of the stuff in the dryer now that I bought today and then we are going to clean up the living room because it's trashed and I am making Dave's birthday dinner tonight. I was just WAY too tired last night and he said that was fine to do it tonight!!

Pain in my butt!!

For the last 3 days I have had a sciatica pain in my left hip and just below my butt. OMG does it hurt!! I figure if I can get through this, I have to be able to get through labor, right??? I was on and off my feet on Saturday, slept horribly, off my feet pretty much all day Sunday. I sat in my in-law's recliner all day except to eat and pee. Friday I slept bad too because I think that is when it was starting, I was all achy and such. So, this morning I felt pretty good, I had slept well, didn't hurt as bad this morning, but after being at work all day I can't move. I can barely stand up and walk around my house. So, I am trying to stay off of my feet as much as I can. I have to make it through this week and then I am done with work. I went Friday with Dave to his chiro. appointment and tried to see if I could get in there this week in the afternoon. Their initial appointments are an hour long. They couldn't get me in, but scheduled me for next Monday. Dave went in this afternoon for his appointment and asked if there were any cancellations since the sciatica had gotten worse and they had a cancellation and got me in for tomorrow afternoon at 2:30!!! I can go there right after work! YAY! I know it won't fix it right away, but I am hoping for some relief tomorrow and then hopefully they can get me in again this week.

I am currently sitting on my birth/exercise ball in hopes of stretching it out a little. I will take a bath AGAIN tonight to hopefully relax it some before going to bed. I was supposed to go to a yoga class tonight with my old yoga teacher, but I called her and told her I just can't do it. I know it would be good for me, but I can barely stand. She is also an awesome massage therapist too, so she is going to try and squeeze me in this week and if not for sure next week. Depending on how I am feeling next week, I will try to fit in the yoga class to help me out some before I give birth. This beautiful baby better come quickly because I hate this pain!!! Plus, I just want to see her!!!:)

Doctor's apt. and ultrasound

Today I had another doctor's appointment, 36 weeks 2 days!! I have a little less than four weeks left of this pregnancy, hopefully less than that. My blood pressure was down a little more, 126/88, still high but better than it has been the last few times. I had the first of my weekly ultrasounds too to check on the fluid levels and make sure Moira is moving around like she should be. Everything checked out great!! After the tech. checked everything, she did a 3D ultrasound to our surprise. They don't usually do them, but will do it for practice for themselves. It was so amazing to actually see our little girl's face!! Anyway, here is a picture!

update on my BP

Yesterday I had an appt. with my regular OB. My BP was a little better than it was on Tuesday when I saw the nurse. Today it was 136/90 and Tuesday it was 144/96 and that is when they sent me to L & D, etc. My 24 hour urine test results came back within normal limits so that's good too!
So, my OB said that she doesn't see me going to my due date, whether she induces me or Moira comes on her own. She said we are going to try to avoid induction because I would rather Moira come on her own. If it means the health of both of us, then I will take the induction. She said if we get to 39/40 weeks and Moira hasn't come yet and my BP is increasing, then we'll induce.
It was a good apt., I got some questions answered that I have had the last week or so, induction being the biggest one. Starting next week she is having me come for weekly ultrasounds as well as my weekly appointments. She wants them to check the fluid levels and make sure she is moving around nicely. She said that high BP can affect the placenta which can affect the fluid levels, so she wants to make sure everything stays good the way it has been!! I don't mind seeing her weekly until she comes!!
So, we'll see what happens in the next few weeks. At this point, she can come whenever she wants to come now that the crib is set up, we are ready! I will post some pictures too!